(Nearly) Two Years Freelance

I’m quickly approaching two years as a full time freelance photographer. It doesn’t seem possible that nearly two years have passed since I left the cosseted warmth of a role in a national public sector organisation where I’d settled down for most of my working life. But time has done its usual evaporating trick and here we are.

Two years feels significant and I’m at that precarious middle point on the bridge where I’ve stepped over the rickety holes, traversed the awkward points and yet I’m not at the other side (I enjoy a metaphor). I can see where I’m heading towards, even though I’m still figuring parts of it out as I go.

So, now that I’m no longer a ‘new’ freelancer, how do the two worlds compare?

Like a tale of two cities you could not get two roles that are more opposite if you tried. Public sector life felt safe, secure and warm. People were generally considerate and collaborative, you were consulted on most things, there’s a policy and process for everything and working for a respected national organisation makes you like offspring of a famous parent. People responded to emails, included you in conversations and were usually keen to help.

And then freelancing… comparatively it’s the black sheep of the family. It can feel much more exposing. Over the last two years I’ve had to develop a level of resilience I never previously needed. Being ignored, ghosted or overlooked becomes strangely normal after a while, and you quickly realise that nobody is going to advocate for you in the way a large organisation often does automatically. I think part of the adjustment came from my own naivety. I assumed people would naturally approach work in a more community-minded way, because that had largely been my experience before. Freelancing has definitely opened my eyes to how competitive some spaces can be.

BUT it absolutely isn’t all doom and gloom because whilst it can be incredibly hard, freelancing is also exciting, fun, unpredictable, energising and incredibly rewarding. It has brought opportunities, experiences and connections that I would never have encountered otherwise. Whilst I’ve sometimes felt a lack of community in certain places, I’ve also discovered brilliant freelance communities filled with people who are generous with advice, encouragement and support. People who genuinely champion each other’s work and understand the unique highs and lows that come with working for yourself.

I’ve changed a lot over these last two years. I work harder than I ever have before, but I also value achievements differently now. Every win, whatever the size, feels meaningful because I know exactly what went into it. I’m far less risk-averse, more willing to try things, more willing to fail and more confident in creating opportunities for myself rather than waiting for permission.

Perhaps that’s been the biggest shift of all.

I’ve spent most of my working life within systems, structures and expectations that were already built. Freelancing has forced me to create my own - often while still deciding what I want them to look like. It’s been uncomfortable, challenging and occasionally exhausting, but it’s also made me grow in ways I don’t think I would have otherwise.

Two years in, I still don’t entirely know what the final picture looks like and I need to be adaptable to get there. But I’m proud of myself for stepping away from certainty and exploring other possibilities.